How to Live Right When Your Life Goes Wrong by Leslie Vernick – The common denominator in all of our destructive behaviors is that we are acting on something that is not true. Gain a new perspective on the troubles God allows in your life. Come on a journey of personal growth and spiritual discovery as your heart is drawn back to a central tenet of the Gospel: Truth isn’t something you learn, but Someone you know. And the truth will set you free.
[31] So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, [32] and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31-32 ESV)
“What’s wrong with me? …Why isn’t God’s Word working? Why am I not changing? These questions are in the hearts of many believers. We pray and read our Bibles, but we also stay stuck in repetitive patterns of immaturity and sin. We try to change and perhaps make some progress, but then we fall back to our old familiar ways. [Have you ever experienced this common frustration?] Down through the ages men and women who have attempted to understand the healing of souls have asked two very important questions: ‘Why do we do what we do?’ and ‘How can we change?'” (pg 83)
This week we will talk about “Why do we do what we do?” and next week we will discuss “How can we change?”.
Why Do We Do What We Do?
“Often times we try to blame our past for our current difficulties. Are our troubles a result of what has happened to us? Are they caused by the way we were raised, or by society’s cultural disadvantages or ills? Some people who were abused as children or who were otherwise hindered from maturing face significant and legitimate suffering in their adult lives. However, why we are the way we are is far more insidious than what has happened in our past. We do what we do not because of what has happened to us but because of what has happened in us.” (pg 84)
So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. [22] And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. [23] Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”
[24] Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. [25] And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. (Genesis 2:21-25 ESV)
. . . Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made.
He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” [2] And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, [3] but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” [4] But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. [5] For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” [6] So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. [7] Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths. (Genesis 3:1-7 ESV)
. . . Then the LORD God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of us in knowing good and evil. Now, lest he reach out his hand and take also of the tree of life and eat, and live forever—” [23] therefore the LORD God sent him out from the garden of Eden to work the ground from which he was taken. (Genesis 3:22-23)
The key verse regarding “what happened in us” is Genesis 5:3
When Adam had lived 130 years, he fathered a son in his own likeness, after his image, and named him Seth. (Genesis 5:3)
“. . . A question we must all face, regardless of our upbringing, our past, our cultural background or whether our life has been advantaged or disadvantaged is, Is God good, and does He have authority in my life and the right to rule me?” (pg 85) In what ways have you struggled to live out your answer to that question?
It comes back to our original tenet – the common denominator in all of our destructive behaviors is that we are acting on something that is not true.
“Temptation can give birth to sin only when it appeals to something already within us that grabs it or attracts it like a magnet. The Bible calls those things that attract temptation our desires. …When successfully Satan takes hold of our desires, whether they be good or sinful, we fall into sin. [What are some examples of good desires that Satan often warps for sin?] Eve did not willingly to God’s authority. Instead she asserted her desire to rule herself. She wanted to be her own authority and make her own decisions. Adam soon followed suit.” (pg 85-86)
Idols of the Heart
“Idols are an unfamiliar term to twentieth-century Western Christians. We can picture missionaries dealing with idol worship, perhaps, but not us here in America. God’s Word, however, has a lot to say to us about idols, especially the idols of the heart.” (pg 92)
Some of the elders of Israel came to me and sat down in front of me. 2 Then the word of the Lord came to me:3 “Son of man, these men have set up idols in their hearts and put wicked stumbling blocks before their faces. Should I let them inquire of me at all? 4 Therefore speak to them and tell them, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says: When any of the Israelites set up idols in their hearts and put a wicked stumbling block before their faces and then go to a prophet, I the Lord will answer them myself in keeping with their great idolatry. 5 I will do this to recapture the hearts of the people of Israel, who have all deserted me for their idols.’ (Ezekiel 14:1-5 NIV)
“How do we know if we have idols in our heart? Take them away and watch your reaction. What happens to you when you don’t have power and control? When you don’t have peace and serenity? When you don’t have pleasure or approval? When you don’t have respect or security? When you don’t have a fat bank account? When you are not recognized for your accomplishments? When you are ignored or humiliated? What happens to you when you don’t get your way? We often don’t know our heart is so attached to our idols until they’re threatened. Then we fight like mad to keep them!” (pg 94)
You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. [4] You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. [5] Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? [6] But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:3-6 ESV)
This is a stern message to the Jews who struggled as much as we do with prideful idols of the heart.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, [20] but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. [21] For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:19-21 ESV)
“Our fears are a helpful way of looking at the other side of what we love. For example: We love success; we fear failure. We love peace; we fear conflict. We love to please people and make them happy; we fear their disapproval or rejection.” (pg 95) Share a fear with the corresponding desire.
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” [6] So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6 ESV)
Please close this reading with a time of personal prayer asking God to reveal your unhealthy desires, setting you free from fear and preparing you for change.
Leave a Reply